And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
You were trust falling into bushes
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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