Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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