Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
