We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize