try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
