i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Randomize
