If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
