what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
