just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Randomize
