in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
