Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize