Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
