how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
