ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
