...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
accomplished twins. life is a go
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize