either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I'm really busy with my period
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