she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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