I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
His nipple licking is glorious
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