I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I would fuck him just for his dog
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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