I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Randomize
