remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
