dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
