So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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