What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I believe in your delicious
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
jump out the window naked night went bad
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
