I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize