theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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