yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
