i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
