Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
