She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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