tell your sister to shave her snatch
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
