let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize
