last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
