your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
