You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize