i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
