I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
