how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
