so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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