I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
