Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Randomize
