So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
