I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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