Midget sex pt 2 tonight
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Too much gin, very little bucket
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
