so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
