Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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