I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
