it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Randomize
