you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
