My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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